Saturday, May 16, 2009

Long week, no pictures

Derrick has been out of town since last Saturday, which has made this quite the hectic week. I've managed to get everything done that needed to be done, though only barely, and only because of much help from other people (for which I am very grateful!). But I have some cool graphs showing relative abundance of carbonate and clays in my core, courtesy of Brenda, and in about a week I should have my first subset of brine shrimp cyst data for the GSL. I'm beginning to believe I might actually be able to get everything done I need for the Isocompound conference and eventually to graduate. Scary.

Having someone else take care of Sylvia has definitely brought up some insecurities in me. I'm not all that nervous a parent, and it was relatively easy for me to leave Sylvia in order to go get work done (though I'd bet the proximity of a big deadline helped with that--I'm nervous enough about this conference that my worries about Sylvia were definitely muted in comparison). It amazes me how much better taken care of Sylvia was by someone else than by me. I certainly don't neglect my daughter, but I don't change her clothes very often, or worry about it if she has a few food stains on her shirt. I don't worry much if Sylvia's clothes match or if they clash horribly as long as they cover her and keep her comfortable. The babysitter, on the other hand, always had Sylvia clean and beautiful for me when I came home. I know the dynamic probably reflects the babysitter wanting to not look like she's neglecting Sylvia at all, but it did make me wonder, am I the only parent out there who doesn't change my child's clothing the moment it has a food spot on it? Should I be changing Sylvia's attire daily (it does sort of sound bad when I say it like that, doesn't it)? Should I be bathing her daily, too? Again, I generally wait until she seems to need a bath for olfactory reasons, which may be daily, but frequently isn't. Sigh. Of all the insecurities to bring up, I find it a little funny my care with Sylvia's attire is the one day care has accentuated.

I'd like to update the photography end of things today, too; I've taken pictures this week, both of Sylvia and for Mission 24, but something happened with Derrick's computer and I can't download anything. Grr. So, I'll have to wait until Monday to download stuff unless I figure out a way to download at school or something. Very disappointing--the challenge on Wednesday was fluid and I took some pretty cool pictures of flowers with water droplets on them and couldn't post them.

Just as a final update, Sylvia is about 18 lb and 27 (or so) inches long right now.


  1. Don't worry. I don't change my girls' clothes when they get dirty - unless we're going somewhere - or someone is coming to see them. Then I spiff them up so everyone thinks they are always super clean (which is probably what the daycare provider does just before you come get her). Although I do like their clothes to match - and I like the two girls' clothes to coordinate. It's just pleasing to my eye. I also always change them into new pj's everynight and new clothes the next day - because their skin is so sensitive and prone to rashes. I never bathed the girls every night - their skin is too dry. And even now, I often do it every other day. They just don't need it. And it's better for their skin and hair NOT to bathe every day. You've just run into the ever present and ever growing phenomenon of "Mommy-guilt" - Just wait until you're able to start thinking about school readiness. I'm making myself mad-crazy about wheather or not I'm doing enough to help her learn. I think that's how the adversary gets us. He turnes nurturing into a contest and turns something so natural and beautiful into something ugly and worldly. Just keep telling yourself that you're doing just fine, and she's happy, and healthy, and that's all that matters.

  2. Thank you--I know probably comparing myself to other mothers is exactly the wrong thing to do, but it's so hard to avoid!

  3. You are a good mother, I know it. Don't worry about matching clothes, bathing frequently, or even perfectly clean clothes. That's not what matters. If it's any consolation, I don't think the type of upbringing we had prepared us for caring about matching clothes, our family helped us focus our energy on better things than fashion. Plus, everyone knows that babies get dirty. Most of the time it's right after you put on new clothes.

  4. if your worst insecurity is her clothing, then my goodness! you are doing great!

  5. If your child is happy and healthy, then whatever you're doing is fine, right?

    (Julian is always sporting dirty clothes and a boogery nose, but always accompanied by lots of smiles, so I don't worry about it. And we also don't bathe him more than every other night, as he is prone to eczema)